Ode to Smithers

I'm so thankful for the blessing of animals. I'm so thankful God lets us keep some of them as pets. They add such a special dimension to life. Its so great coming home from ANYTHING and having animals there to greet you. Its so great to be able to squeeze a purring cat to your chest during those times when you just need a good cry. Its so great to be able to come downstairs in the morning to a cat that sings to you with happiness that you're awake. Its so fun to watch a furry grey cat catch a fuzzy colorful ball over and over again as if its a mouse, and to have her carefully put it in places where she thinks you'll find it and be able to enjoy the fruits of her labor. Its so fun to watch little Smithers' anticipating face when you pick up the little fuzzy ball in order to throw it down the stairs for her to capture again. Its such fun to hold her near the refrigerator and let her play her favorite game: scraping the magnets off the fridge door. Its always such a pleasant surprise to walk into the kitchen and hear rustling in the cupboard door above you where our paper plates and plastic utensils are kept, and then witness an innocent happy cat step out of the cupboard onto the refrigerator. Its so entertaining to pretend like you're about to sneeze in her presence and hear her meow in protest (she's always hated sneezing). Its so cute to see the way she behaves around my dog, Oscar, because she thinks he's her best friend. I love to hold her because she grabs onto your neck like a monkey and PURRS and purrs.

I feel sick with an emptiness and a sorrow that I feel silly having. Smithers was always my sister's cat, ever since my sister first brought her home a little over three years ago. Or maybe four. Hard to remember. The point is, Smithers has been in my family's home all that time. We've grown so much more than fond of her. She's got the most personality I've ever seen in a cat. Sweet personality.

After Heather got married this June she asked that my family would keep Smithers until she and Matt were finally on their way to their final destination and home in Seattle, Washington. Now that Matt is done with his officer's training in Missouri, the time has come. This morning before church, my little brother and I said goodbye to our little foster cat. This is the most traumatic parting with an animal that we've ever experienced. We've never had a dog or cat die on us. So this is hard.

I finally got up the appetite to eat some lunch at about 2 pm. Unfortunately as I sat down to eat my grilled cheese Hunter started up a song mix that he had made about Smithers. By the time the mix got to "Yellow Brick Road" by Elton John I couldn't stomach another bite. I haven't even really listened to the words. Just knowing that Hunter picked it out for this time and hearing the bittersweet melody was enough. Hot tears streamed down my face.

Its okay if this post makes you chuckle. Everything about this experience has made both Hunter and I laugh and cry at the same time. We're desperately looking forward to June when we get to go to Seattle for the birth of our little niece and at the same time...visit Smithers. :) Happy thought.